There is no other time in your life when waiting seems so long as when you’re sick. It doesn’t matter if you’re sitting in a chair at the doctor’s office or waiting for a procedure - it’s hard to wait. Lately I’ve begun to wonder if there are rules for waiting. You know, some kind of secret waiting room etiquette. I started thinking about this last week when my nerves were especially shot and I wasn’t feeling like obeying ANY rules.
I’m a wiggler anyway, but tell me to sit still and I can find a bazillion things that need my attention. That includes my hands as well as my mind. Somehow sitting in a room full of strangers only serves to magnify the truth that I don’t have control over certain areas of my life right now.
After the liver tumor growth news, I vowed to chill out and stay calm during my waiting time. I checked in at the desk where the receptionist gave me a smile of satisfaction and a bright purple laminated number. She made a checkmark on the line beside my name. It was going well for her on this day. Everyone was seated and looking at their own colorful numbers, their phones, or the blaring television.
I made a beeline to the far corner. I managed to sit quietly for all of 2 minutes before I purposefully slunk out of my chair and onto the floor and twisted myself into a yoga pose. Closing my eyes, I tuned out everyone and everything around me and focused on breathing.
Each inhale drew in more than just air. I was drawing in life and love from the universe. I was filtering out every distracting thought and sound. Each exhale released anxiety from my tense muscles. It also brought a lot of stares from the other waitees.
Suddenly, I felt self-conscious. I swear I heard my mama’s voice admonishing a 6 year old me to quit wallering in the floor and sit up straight like a young lady. Meekly, and with as much dignity as possible, I crawled back up into my chair...
To read Karen’s entire, quite hilarious blog entry from March 10, 2015, click on IHelpC.com