Dealing with disappointment when hep C treatment doesn’t work is hard, but we can move beyond it so we don’t stay there. I learned some important lessons on how to move beyond disappointment when hep C treatment doesn’t work.
I received sad news recently from a friend about her journey with hep C treatment that went south. She got bad news from her doctor that the current treatment she was on was not working.
I held back the tears as I read her note. I was immediately filled with sadness and disappointment for my friend. It hit me in the gut for many reasons. One, for what my friend is going through and second, because I live each day with a whisper away from not knowing that I could hear that same news.
When you have a chronic condition that has taken up residence in your body, you feel invaded. Your desire is to kick the invader out with all their baggage, lock, stock and barrel. You long for the days of freedom, and especially after you have fought a hard battle with going through hep C treatment.
Last night all I could think of was my friend. I was heartsick for her and I was filled with disappointment and sorrow. I drew within myself. The flood of tears came and I let loose. All I could think about was praying and going before the Lord for my friend, my fellow Hep C Warrior.
Battle stinks. Battle’s are hard and nasty. Hep C Warriors hold a tight bond with one another. We may not always know each other face to face, but we do heart to heart. We live out the battle with hep C every day and we know what each other faces. So, when a fellow Warrior is hit hard, it hits home, it’s personal to all of us. We care what happens to each other because we are all in this fight together.
But how do we deal with disappointment when treatment has not worked, when we hear dreaded news from the doctor? I went to God’s word and His listening heart has I prayed for my friend. I asked Him, “Lord, what do we do as Hep C Warriors who have fought such a hard battle and faced disappointment?”
This was His answer, “Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” Psalm 42:5
“Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,” says the Lord, who has compassion on you. Isaiah 54:10
He guided to the words in Psalms. . .
“Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, If I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, ”Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,“ even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is light to you.” Psalm 139:7-12
“All the days ordained for me--were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, O God” How vast the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you. (Our days, our destiny are in God’s control, NOT Hepatitis C!).
Have you ever been filled with such disappointment and grief that you felt like you were in a nightmare? Listen, carefully to those words - The darkness is not dark to God for His presence is there, His presence is right there with you now in your darkest time, when you are filled with disappointment, He is still there. “When I awake, I am still with you.”
God reminded me of so many instances where He was there, right there in the middle of trouble, and He never left. I hope you will join me tomorrow as we talk more about “Dealing with disappointment when hep C treatment does not work, part 2,” and find out how our fellow Hep C Warrior is doing. I can tell you, she is a woman of mighty courage.
Tomorrow: Dealing with Disappointment: When Hep C Treatment Doesn’t Work, Part 2
This entry was originally published on Life Beyond Hepatitis C November 25, 2014. It is reprinted with permission.